My Family

I just enjoyed a week off of work and returned in today. It was a bit of a wrench, I got used to waking up with Archie and enjoying playing with him whilst he is the most smiley - in the morning he seems to grin at anything and seeing a big gummy smile is great first thing in the morning.

I've realised that I haven't mentioned my new job on here. Basically, in a nutshell, I love it.

I work with a great team and during the day we have a great laugh. The work I do is enjoyable, and working on the new business is very fulfilling. It is taking shape and will look excellent. I think that the advertising that I will be flogging will sell itself, which makes my job even easier.

We get out of the office once a month for some fun, and I have enjoyed pool competitions, a "games day" competition and best of all we went go karting one morning.

My boss is fantastic and really does put family first. When I told people that after my interview a lot of people were sceptical, they said he'd say that sort of thing in an interview along with his claim that it is a strict 35 hour week... but he does live by his word. At 4.55pm he is getting everyone to log off of their computers and go home.

As for family comes first, he gave me two weeks fully paid leave (in addition to my holiday entitlement) when Archie was born, which was great as I wasn't entitled to it. He gave me paid time off to take Lucie to various appointments and even said I could attend antenatal classes (but I thought that was too unfair on my colleagues who would have to cover for me).

Furthermore, he offered me the chance to go home the other day when he learnt that my family was having some issues. "Look mate, you know my policy on families, that comes first and if you need to go and sort things out just go".

Basically, my sister has left home. That's no biggie in itself, but it's the manner in which she did it. Acting like a 12 year old, she moved some clothes out whilst everyone else was out, refused to tell anyone where she was and she refused to discuss it with my parents.

OK, that's not too bad, but lets not forget that there is a four year old and a six year old girl involved in this who lost their dad in February.

They started off coping well but as time has gone on they have showed signs of suffering. One of them started wetting the bed, the other cried if she suddenly realised that she didn't know where her mum was and will only fall asleep in her arms. They did really badly over Fathers' Day and asked if they could have their daddy back for Christmas.

In the opinion of our GP, they need counselling... and so does my sister. She has become much more emotional and argumentative. I mean, she was hardly what I would call emotionally stable in an argument anyway, but she has been a lot worse lately. What sparked all this off was my mum asking her to tidy her room a little, as you couldn't see the floor in there and she needed some washing baskets back (they were all in her room, full up with clothes that my mum ironed for her).

So she's disappeared and I've constantly had my mum on the phone in tears. They haven't seen the girls that my parents have helped raise for their whole lives since she sneaked out.

At first I stayed relatively neutral when discussing it with my sister, purely because it allowed me to get some information about her whereabouts and how the girls were doing. But after a week I couldn't take it any more and called her to let her know exactly how I felt - that she should have a lot more bloody respect for my parents who have helped support her her whole life (she has never left home) and who did a lot for her when her husband tragically died.

At the end of the call I thought maybe I was getting somewhere as she started talking about when she could see my parents, but when she came around (I was there) she just stood in the doorway to the living room and didn't say a word. My sister, a 26 year old mother of two, still acts like a five year old.

She claims that she 'needs her own space' and that she can live as a single parent "because the government will help". Basically, she's taking counsel from some friends and not listening to her family. She's obviously told them about how "horrible" my parents are and they are giving her advice that I would never give anyone else. We even know who these people are because my mum works with them, and they even told my sister that my mum had send them a text telling her not to bother ever coming home... a text that was never sent.

She's told us all about the benefits she'll get, supposedly she'll get her rent paid and help with the council tax. But having never lived on her own I don't think that she appreciates everything else that comes with living on your own - electricity, gas, water, tv licence, phone, transport, food.

She has had her ass wiped for her over the last few years with babysitters on demand and paying only £50 a month for food and rent. One of the issues that has been causing arguments is that lately she says to my parents "I'm going out" at the drop of a hat and expects them to look after the kids. She might get a shock when she wants to go out with her friends next and realises that she has two kids to consider.

And she needs to think about furniture. She had the audacity to ask my parents to take the furniture in her room - furniture that my parents purchased. They rightfully said no, and are slowly becoming more militant. They've changed all the locks on the doors as she was coming in whilst people were out and taking things with god knows who, and I hope slowly she'll realise that there were better ways of doing all of this (my parents have already said that they would have helped her move somewhere more local where they could still support her and the girls if she had told them that she wanted to move out, and even offered this as an alternative early on in this whole escapade).

She claims that she can live in a remote village where she has found a house which requires two bus changes to get the girls to primary school, which is probably a novelty now but we'll see how long it will last. Her workplace is another bus journey away which to me just proves that she's not thinking any of this through.

Either way, I've washed my hands of it now and until I decide she's seeing sense we're not talking. The only time I hear about it is when my mum phones me in tears yet again.